Well the first game wuz over faster than a Auburn Spellin’ Bee or a Steve Spurrier lecture on humbleness. Austern Pee shut down faster than a Gater Gift Shop in Hahira. Now this Caroliner Chicken deal is specially important to “Ravishin’ Roderick” the Rhode Island Red Rooster as he is sharpenin’ up his stainless steel spurs to whup up on that big ol’ cluckin’ Cock-A-Doodle-Doo they got over to Columbier.
The SEC opener calls fer special eats and Eunice Wylene is gonna fix up some okra fritters and Charlene Bootsie is workin’ on a Fox pie and 175 pounds a ‘tater salad. Add on two 250 pound smoked hawgs, 5o fried turkeys, 300 deviled eggs, 18 peach pies, 26 water melons, 180 pounds a fried catfish, 40 jumbo bags a caramel corn and 32 cases a PBR and the Bubba Ray Brigade will be ready fer kick-off and the first “W” toward their next SEC Champeenship.
Gonna be settin’ up camp by Wednesday and Pecker Osburn is makin’ a big ol’ banner what sez “Pluck Yerself”. That may cause a ruckus with some a them ‘Cocks but Skeeter Doorock is ready with his ‘tater launcher and “Figerin'” Perry Figers they will be ready to deal with all Caroliner Chickens. ‘Course the biggest suspense is whether or not Sports Model is gonna max out on her “Inflate-N-Date” brasserie and have Dawgs barkin’ and ‘Cocks cluckin’.
Time to git down to bitness.
Dawgs know that ‘Cocks is chickens
and their eggs is brown or white
They might come fried er scrambled
and they frequently start a fight
The problem with a chicken
is he cannot swim er fly
He loves to cluck and flutter
while the trophies pass ‘im by
Coach Must Chomp has ’em crowin’
they’re as sure as ‘Cocks can be
But when them Dawgs is finished
they’ll be joinin’ KFC
Sometimes them ‘Cocks git really close
and think they’re gonna win
but then they fall right outta sight
jest like they always been
Them Hairy Dawgs will rule the East
and feast on chicken wings
They’ll leave them ‘Cocks a flappin’ mess
for more important things
It’s Cock-A-Doodle-Doo all day
It’s awful as can be
Them ‘Cocks jest might score 20
But them Dawgs score 33!